WRAD Memories

I'm finally trying to get my home school reports in to my support teacher and I'm realizing just how much my kids have not been listening to many of the things that I have been telling them to do. It's almost like they are on a quest to see how little they can do/get away with before I get upset with them. However, I think my frustration level with this is probably linked more to my realization that I'M not doing things that I think God has told ME to do (or told me to stop doing but I'm still doing them). So, I'm reaping what I'm sowing- and I hate it. But I've also realized something else- my heart doesn't really want to change things. My head KNOWS I should, but the 'rubber is not meeting the road' at this point. After all, who really doesn't like being selfish and getting their way and doing whatever they want when they want to do it? Forget about serving others, I want to be served! And yet, it grieves me each night when ...

Lately I haven't been feeling like I'm getting anywhere with things. I'm dwelling too much on what's NOT working (or getting done, etc.), than I am on what IS working. The laundry piles, the cluttered counters and dirty dishes, the 'still unplanned home school/day schedule', kids who've decided that they don't want to listen or do anything you've told them for the past 10 years! Yadda, yadda, yadda. It's easy to get dragged down into the dumps when you do that. This then becomes a catch-22 where you get so upset that you just want to numb yourself in some way: internet, Facebook, reading, hobbies, eating, drinking, drugs, etc. The list is long of things that we use to fill the hole that's there in our lives. Unfortunately, what they all have in common is that fact that the moment we turn to them instead of to God- they become our idols. As I've been reading through the Old Testament I've been pondering the whole 'heart att...

I always think it's neat when I can see God moving in my life. For me lately, everything I'm reading in my bible (as I attempt to go cover-to-cover in 90 days), all the sermons I'm hearing and the topics from our Friday night bible study group, are all pointing to the same thing. A total, heartfelt obedience to God. Like my blog post  here . This past week, I finally hit that moment of surrender. And was it ever freeing. God gave me such a cool picture to go along with it- but that's just for me and Him for now. But surrender is only the first step- now I need to walk that out. Doing ALL the things He asks me to and NOT doing those things that He says not to. I feel overwhelmed by it all. Where do I start? However, those thoughts are mine, not His. Surrender is listening for the next instruction and then doing it. And then repeating the whole listening/doing thing for the rest of my life. It's laying down my agenda for what I want to do/accompl...

I started a summer project. Oh yes, not like bringing home a puppy wasn't enough craziness for the summer- I've gone and added something else. I set a goal for myself- read through my bible in 90 days. At first I hummed and hawed about doing it. Would I really retain anything to make it worthwhile? Shouldn't I do a slow methodical study to get as much as possible out of it? Blah, blah, blah... Then I figured, anything that gets me at least reading my bible on a regular basis (whatever the outcome) would be a GOOD thing. So I started out with great enthusiasm and even got a day ahead of myself. Now, I'm behind (surprise, surprise). REALLY behind. Out of town visitors and a week of camping will do that, but I'm working on getting caught up again. Until then, I want to share a little nugget that I got from Ex. 36:2. "Then Moses summoned Bezalel and Oholiab and every skilled person to whom the Lord had given ability and who was willing to come and ...