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Small Victories

Lately I haven't been feeling like I'm getting anywhere with things.

I'm dwelling too much on what's NOT working (or getting done, etc.), than I am on what IS working. The laundry piles, the cluttered counters and dirty dishes, the 'still unplanned home school/day schedule', kids who've decided that they don't want to listen or do anything you've told them for the past 10 years! Yadda, yadda, yadda.

It's easy to get dragged down into the dumps when you do that. This then becomes a catch-22 where you get so upset that you just want to numb yourself in some way: internet, Facebook, reading, hobbies, eating, drinking, drugs, etc.

The list is long of things that we use to fill the hole that's there in our lives. Unfortunately, what they all have in common is that fact that the moment we turn to them instead of to God- they become our idols.

As I've been reading through the Old Testament I've been pondering the whole 'heart attitude' concept- and checking mine to try and see where all the 'high places' are in my life. Those places and things that I turn to and give my time to instead of taking the problems, hurts and disappointments to God. Food and computer being my biggest two areas.

I think that there are a lot of places that need to be torn down in my life. However, tonight I celebrate a small victory and I want to share it with some- so here you go.

Normally if I need to go pick up the odd bit of groceries, I usually buy myself a 'treat' (chocolate bar, doughnut, etc.). Nobody but me ever knows about this since I handle the finances (well, okay- now anyone who reads this will know, but so far that's a pretty low number at this point).

Tonight I needed to run out and pick up some stuff to make my husband's lunch for tomorrow. Almost the entire way there I was thinking about what I could get for my 'treat'. Even though I know that eating something like that this late at night will not be conducive to anything that resembles sleeping for the next few hours.

But I didn't do it.

Oh, I looked at the options and thought about it. But in the end, I didn't do it.

And that made me happy.

So for tonight, in spite of a day that had some nasty moments that made me want to cry, I will relish in this victory.

Tonight I won.

Keeping it real, by the grace of God...
Tammy

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