WRAD Memories

One of the main reasons that I haven't been writing over the past year (other than being really busy with cadets and my grandmother's ongoing history project....) is that things have been pretty crappy around here. I haven't really been feeling like I'm getting anywhere with anything- so how could I put a great spin on something that just seems to suck? In the past when I'd tried blogging (or journaling), it always seemed like I was just whining and complaining about the same things over and over again. And nobody really wants to hear about that, so then I just don't write. People have enough garbage going on in their own lives that they don't need to listen to someone else whine about theirs. But is that really where we're at? I know that there has been some backlash against this with the 'Bad Mommy' type memoirs and blogs, however, that's not really what I'm talking about. I think it's sometimes about being real and vulner...

Earlier this month I went to a Ladies Retreat. I was so excited to finally have everything work out (or so I thought) for me to go. A friend had told me about the speaker several years earlier and they had had some retreats in the past, but they were too expensive and I either had a little one that couldn't be left or Graham was working and couldn't watch them. Finally, I realized that Graham actually had that weekend off and I had his permission- so I signed up to go. Only after I paid did I realize that I was actually supposed to be really busy that weekend. Elijah had the Cadet 'Tag Days' that weekend as well as Graham's work 'Family Fun Day'. Yikes! I actually considered cancelling but figured that if God had worked this out for me to go, I should go. Besides, I figured that I needed this 'refreshing' break to rejuvenate me to be a better wife/mom/teacher (that was the speaker's focus). Notice how I put the 'refreshing' part...

I didn't cave. I also should have just stayed off of Facebook, but I didn't cave. Last summer I chose NOT send my kids to summer camp- even though, seemingly, ALL their friends were going. The same week. All of them. Well, not really, of course. But honestly, with Facebook status updates coming in fast and furiously- it really did seem like it. And I wondered, 'Am I a bad mom because I didn't send my kids to summer camp with their friends?' At one point, I seriously thought about calling up the camp (after the week had started) and seeing if I couldn't somehow manage to get them in anyway. I let the thought pass- and didn't cave. But I still feel a tinge of guilt about it and I'm dreading the decision about this summer already. Fast forward a few more months- to February 7, 2014 to be exact. Pretty much anyone with even the slightest interest in Lego will know what that date means. The release of their first full-length feature movie....

The first time it dawned on my was when Elijah was 6 weeks old. The first 'real' smile from our baby and Graham had gotten it. I was mad! I was also hurt, angry, confused... Why had HE gotten the first smile when I'm taking care of this baby 24/7? I'M the one that is up all night with him. I'M the one spending hours every day feeding him, changing his diaper, etc. But that's when I realized it- I was spending so much time 'taking care of' my baby that I forgot to enjoy my baby. And that's all that Graham did. Once I realized what I was doing (or rather NOT doing) I made some changes and eventually got my own smiles. But somehow, over time, I've fallen back into that rut. I've been so focused on the tasks of parenting that I've been missing out on the relationships of parenting. Teaching manners, training in chores, getting their school work done, music practiced- you know the parenting drill. Working for perfection and mis...

Okay, I'm just going to say it- Christmas really isn't my favourite time of the year! It probably has a lot to do with the fact that my husband intensely dislikes this time of the year. He doesn't have very fond memories of Christmas from his childhood and so it's really poisoned his attitude. As a result, most years Christmas is merely a blip on the calendar, and then we keep plowing through- basically ignoring the whole thing insofar as we can. Having said that, I decided that this year I wanted to do things differently. To slow down and put some thought into WHY we even do this in the first place. I started by getting an Advent book and candles- so that we'd have a daily reading to do. The story is quite interesting (and very gruesome at times), but as we're working our way through it- I'm realizing it's the right book to help us learn and remember. Then, I decided that we'd scale back the school work (which wasn't too difficult beca...

Leaving the hubby home and going camping with the kids and my parents for the week. Hopefully I can do a post or two while I'm gone, but if not- you'll now know why it's been quite around here. Relatively speaking anyway- things have NOT been dull. Or quite. Anyway, I should try and get packed since we leave in the morning. Keeping it real, by the grace of God... Tammy