Tonight I NEED to write.
It's been a LONG summer so far and for no reason really, I felt like the past few days have just about put me over the edge.
So I need to write and find the good in this, because if I don't I keep dwelling on the bad.
Today started with an interesting dream. In it, I was going to be driving my friend's car- but I realized the back passenger door was open and thought 'I need to close it before I go'.
For some reason I didn't- and only discovered that when I got to my destination. I got out to check to see if there was any damage and both the doors on that side were massively scraped up. I felt sick to my stomach over it. There was no way to hide the damage and no way I could pretend it never happened.
In some ways, it's a lot like life.
You see something that you KNOW you really need to do. Unfortunately, life distracts you and it doesn't get done (or the other way- you don't stop doing things you know you shouldn't do anymore).
Sometimes this isn't a problem (like the police officer having already pulled the other speeder over so he couldn't clock you speeding....).
Other times, like in my dream, it turns into a huge, massive, expensive problem that you can't hide or run from.
It reminds me of the 'Blame Game'. You find it all throughout scripture.
We all know the first time it was played- in the Garden of Eden.
But another instance that struck me as funny and sad at the same time was Moses' version of the 'Blame Game'.
He spent 40 years blaming the children of Israel for the fact that HE wasn't going to be able to enter the Promise Land.
I had always thought that Moses 'manned-up', so to speak, about his transgression of not doing things the way God told him to and instead, struck the rock.
A simple oversight, with massive consequences.
Finally, in Deut. 3: 21 - 29, we see where Moses has given it one more try- 'please God, You're so great and amazing- please can I go into the Promise Land, pretty please'.
Finally, God says 'Enough! Don't speak to Me about this again.'
And Moses is still blaming the Israelites for what HE did (Deut. 3:26).
In a sad way it reminds me of how my kids can pester me for things- and how it just about puts you over the edge till you say 'ENOUGH!' (nice to know God can relate, right?).
On the other hand, it reminds me of how I spend a LOT of time blaming others for where things are at in my life- that I'm innocent and life would be perfect if they'd get their act together.
Not. True.
I know that this summer has had a LOT of external circumstances that have thrown me major curve-balls.
Yes! Things happen.
Actually, most of life is out of our control.
What is in our control is our response.
As I'm reading through my bible (which I'm actually getting sort of caught up on- YIPEE!), I'm reminded again that these things have been allowed to test me.
Will I press in hard and lean on God or will I descend into the pity party/blame game routine?
For me, I'm working on choosing God.
Keeping it real, by the grace of God...
Tammy
It's been a LONG summer so far and for no reason really, I felt like the past few days have just about put me over the edge.
So I need to write and find the good in this, because if I don't I keep dwelling on the bad.
Today started with an interesting dream. In it, I was going to be driving my friend's car- but I realized the back passenger door was open and thought 'I need to close it before I go'.
For some reason I didn't- and only discovered that when I got to my destination. I got out to check to see if there was any damage and both the doors on that side were massively scraped up. I felt sick to my stomach over it. There was no way to hide the damage and no way I could pretend it never happened.
In some ways, it's a lot like life.
You see something that you KNOW you really need to do. Unfortunately, life distracts you and it doesn't get done (or the other way- you don't stop doing things you know you shouldn't do anymore).
Sometimes this isn't a problem (like the police officer having already pulled the other speeder over so he couldn't clock you speeding....).
Other times, like in my dream, it turns into a huge, massive, expensive problem that you can't hide or run from.
It reminds me of the 'Blame Game'. You find it all throughout scripture.
We all know the first time it was played- in the Garden of Eden.
But another instance that struck me as funny and sad at the same time was Moses' version of the 'Blame Game'.
He spent 40 years blaming the children of Israel for the fact that HE wasn't going to be able to enter the Promise Land.
I had always thought that Moses 'manned-up', so to speak, about his transgression of not doing things the way God told him to and instead, struck the rock.
A simple oversight, with massive consequences.
Finally, in Deut. 3: 21 - 29, we see where Moses has given it one more try- 'please God, You're so great and amazing- please can I go into the Promise Land, pretty please'.
Finally, God says 'Enough! Don't speak to Me about this again.'
And Moses is still blaming the Israelites for what HE did (Deut. 3:26).
In a sad way it reminds me of how my kids can pester me for things- and how it just about puts you over the edge till you say 'ENOUGH!' (nice to know God can relate, right?).
On the other hand, it reminds me of how I spend a LOT of time blaming others for where things are at in my life- that I'm innocent and life would be perfect if they'd get their act together.
Not. True.
I know that this summer has had a LOT of external circumstances that have thrown me major curve-balls.
Yes! Things happen.
Actually, most of life is out of our control.
What is in our control is our response.
As I'm reading through my bible (which I'm actually getting sort of caught up on- YIPEE!), I'm reminded again that these things have been allowed to test me.
Will I press in hard and lean on God or will I descend into the pity party/blame game routine?
For me, I'm working on choosing God.
Keeping it real, by the grace of God...
Tammy
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