A few days ago I watched a video about distracted moms (by Carol Barnier author of the book "If I'm Diapering a Watermelon, Then Where'd I Leave the Baby?: Help for the Highly Distractible Mom"). I thought to myself, 'yeah, I guess I can get a bit distracted'.
Little did I know that probably the next day I would realize just how bad it was.
I was trying to explain some math concept to one of the boys and I noticed that his fingernails REALLY needed to be cut.
It took EVERY ounce of self control to not interrupt what we were doing and go cut them that very second.
I immediately thought back to the video. Yep. I'm a distracted mom.
But something in what she said in the video really hit a nerve deep within.
At first she thought that she needed to fix this distractability and become the Pinterest perfect home schooling mom.
She had charts and list and everything possible to keep herself organized and on task.
Only it didn't work because the moment she turned away, she'd get distracted by something else and forget what she was supposed to be doing (not all the time but enough to be a problem).
(Just to prove this point, I have a schedule written up in the home school room- I don't think we've followed it yet and it's been up there for probably a good month so far. Oh, I look at it every so often and lament how we're not on schedule but then I turn away and ignore it again.)
Then, she realized that God didn't make her to be a focused regimented person and that no matter how hard she tried it wasn't going to happen.
Who she was wasn't something that was broken and needed fixing- it was who God made her to be.
Now that didn't mean she just gave up and did whatever. Rather, she began to figure out ways to work around the shortcomings while embracing the strengths that God gave her.
She realized that God knew what kind of personality and skill set her kids needed in their mother and gave her exactly that.
For a long time I've been trying to live up to what I thought I was- someone with a Type A personality that is super organized and can do it all (and do it all perfectly)!
In a way, I've been getting madder and madder because I think God made a mistake with me.
My wants (of a clean, organized house and orderly run home school) aren't lining up with my reality and I'm frustrated. I don't want my life to be like this.
Maybe that's why I haven't felt like blogging lately- I'm doing the pity party and this blog isn't the place for that (actually no place is Phil 2:14).
This is really going to be a 180° in terms of my thinking. Actually embracing who I am instead of what I thought I was (or rather what I wanted to be).
Letting go of pre-conceived ideas about what I should be and figuring out how God made me the right way for my kids.
Obviously, my kids didn't need a Type-A personality mother.
So what do they need? I'm not sure- for them or for me.
Does it absolve me of trying to keep things organized and running smoothly? No way!
I'd like to say my perfectionist, Type-A personality is going to buckle down and figure this whole thing out and come up with a plan- but now I'm not so sure that that is even true anymore.
I think it will be a daily work in progress- learning how to give myself, and others, the grace to flourish into what God has REALLY created each of us to be.
Keeping it real, by the grace of God...
Tammy
Little did I know that probably the next day I would realize just how bad it was.
I was trying to explain some math concept to one of the boys and I noticed that his fingernails REALLY needed to be cut.
It took EVERY ounce of self control to not interrupt what we were doing and go cut them that very second.
I immediately thought back to the video. Yep. I'm a distracted mom.
But something in what she said in the video really hit a nerve deep within.
At first she thought that she needed to fix this distractability and become the Pinterest perfect home schooling mom.
She had charts and list and everything possible to keep herself organized and on task.
Only it didn't work because the moment she turned away, she'd get distracted by something else and forget what she was supposed to be doing (not all the time but enough to be a problem).
(Just to prove this point, I have a schedule written up in the home school room- I don't think we've followed it yet and it's been up there for probably a good month so far. Oh, I look at it every so often and lament how we're not on schedule but then I turn away and ignore it again.)
Then, she realized that God didn't make her to be a focused regimented person and that no matter how hard she tried it wasn't going to happen.
Who she was wasn't something that was broken and needed fixing- it was who God made her to be.
Now that didn't mean she just gave up and did whatever. Rather, she began to figure out ways to work around the shortcomings while embracing the strengths that God gave her.
She realized that God knew what kind of personality and skill set her kids needed in their mother and gave her exactly that.
For a long time I've been trying to live up to what I thought I was- someone with a Type A personality that is super organized and can do it all (and do it all perfectly)!
In a way, I've been getting madder and madder because I think God made a mistake with me.
My wants (of a clean, organized house and orderly run home school) aren't lining up with my reality and I'm frustrated. I don't want my life to be like this.
Maybe that's why I haven't felt like blogging lately- I'm doing the pity party and this blog isn't the place for that (actually no place is Phil 2:14).
This is really going to be a 180° in terms of my thinking. Actually embracing who I am instead of what I thought I was (or rather what I wanted to be).
Letting go of pre-conceived ideas about what I should be and figuring out how God made me the right way for my kids.
Obviously, my kids didn't need a Type-A personality mother.
So what do they need? I'm not sure- for them or for me.
Does it absolve me of trying to keep things organized and running smoothly? No way!
I'd like to say my perfectionist, Type-A personality is going to buckle down and figure this whole thing out and come up with a plan- but now I'm not so sure that that is even true anymore.
I think it will be a daily work in progress- learning how to give myself, and others, the grace to flourish into what God has REALLY created each of us to be.
Keeping it real, by the grace of God...
Tammy
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